The Way The Cookie Crumbles

While walking to my next bus stop this morning something very, very colorful (think blinding) walked passed me and I could not help but stop dead in my tracks. My curiosity, for once, was bolder then my need to hide from the world. What the fuck was that? I turned my head and it took a while before my eyes were adjusted to the violent colors that were crashing against my eyes.

Then I saw it; not only was it violent colors, but it was leggings. and not only were the leggings colorful, but the jacket, the sweater AND the shoes were as well. It looked like she had a run in with some paint ball aficionados and lost.

First off, why the hell wear leggings in this weather? It is cold, it is raining, those thin little things don’t protect you from it. Not to mention I, and everyone else, get to see everything you have to hide in it. Every little dent, every little bump, every little curve you have. I do not want to see how unshaped your ass is or how your vagina is shaped. I like ‘em, but I do not need to see them in ill fitted clothing thank you very much!

If you do have the nerve wearing something like that, DO NOT USE BRIGHT, BLINDING colors. Make it a white one, or a black one and for the sake of everyone, WEAR SOMETHING OVER IT. I do not want to see a camel toe; I get enough of that with the celebrities who wear the wrong things.

Now granted; I myself don’t always wear the most fashionable things, I go for comfort, but that does not mean I wear things that allow people to see anything and everything there is to see.

It is like men wearing those tight bicycle things where you can see the entire package. I do not want to see that entire thing either. It makes me want to hurl.

I can not believe how people can even think that those things are comfortable. I used to wear them when I was little in my obligatory gym classes and all I could think about was how to get the damn thing to stop crawling up my ass.

And if I was ever forced into them again, because that is the ONLY way I’ll ever wear them, wait I will never where those things again, but if someone else has the unfortunate honor of having to do that, make sure it is ONE color and not look like someone threw different color paint buckets at you.